The Jerk and the Doofus

This morning we woke up to the first snowfall of the season. Let me correct the term morning, morning was 1:15am. Mitch ever the dedicated wanted to get up an hour earlier than normal so he could get to work extra early in order to get all of the equipment they use at work up and ready for a day of deicing one airplane after the other. Anyway at 1:15 this morning we had about two inches of snow on the ground and it was still snowing fairly heavily.

After I fed the dogs and Mitch in that order, got him to work then it was time for our morning stroll. The dogs started off down the road with Orso the Doofus head down eating snow as he was loping along. He kept lurching ahead wanting to race around and play in the snow. Charlie the Jerk walked along at his usual pace head down sniffing the ground always hunting and because Mitch lets him get away with murder, Charlie has a really irritating tendency to race back and forth from one side of the road to the other, yanking my arm around. It is nearly impossible to be on both sides of the street at the same time, but Charlie gives it his best shot.

We had reached our turn around point on the walk and started back when Orso forgot he was eight years old and suddenly became a two year old again. He lunged forward yanking the leash causing me to lose my balance on the slick road. I went down in what had to be a very graceful plop in the road landing on my butt hard. I lost my grip on the leash and Orso took off with his butt down racing around in circles slipping and sliding in the snow. It was a good thing I let go of the leash because otherwise I would have literally been dragged down the road. On one of the laps around Charlie and me, Orso decided that both of us should join in the winter fun. He ran over me stepping on me and bashing into Charlie. Charlie didn’t forget he is ten years old and snapped at Orso growling and trying fruitlessly to get in a good bite or two, also stepping on me in the process.

Orso undaunted raced off to find a weapon to battle the Jerk with. He came across a stick snatched it up and waved it around whacking Charlie and me in the head. Charlie went after Orso with a deadly purpose, causing Orso to race away barking back at Charlie. Now I have one dog barking and one dog with murder in his eye at 3:30 in the morning. My neighbors just love us.

I was finally able to get back up on my feet and grabbed both leashes got the dogs under control and finished the walk with all of us covered in snow. It’s going to be a long winter.

10 thoughts on “The Jerk and the Doofus

  1. Thanks for the laugh! I hope that you and Charlie only received little bruises!!! Yes, happy winter. LK

    Sent from my iPhone


  2. Being a canine I see your experience differently. Somewhere along the line you’ve gotten the idea we want do to, what you want to do. Wrong! And, Charlie was simply trying to give you a sleighless ride. A sign of love. I see you’ve seen fit to use disparaging nick-names for lovable Charlie and Orso. Did you ever think they might have a less than flattering reference for you? Like Gracie-the-elephant? I’m incensed. I showed your post to my human and he thought it was great…. Proof you just can’t the human out of the bipod!

    1. Sandy you’re absolutely right, I should speak kinder of those two menaces. And I have heard them call me names too, like klutzo and dragon lady, both probably well deserved. As to our status on the food chain, I know that they rule the roost here, I’m just along for the ride.

      1. I get cranky with herself if she pulls on me at all – which is why I don’t walk her any more as HE has ruined any chance at a calm walkie in town. She and I only get on if I let her off-lead, because she stays behind me or I bark at her.

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